The Happiest Medium » Suzen Murakoshi

Breathe, Love, Repeat: A Near Life Experience (2012 FRIGID NEW YORK FESTIVAL)

Geoffrey Paddy Johnson — Sun, 26 Feb 2012 03:05:19 +0000

Suzen Murakoshi‘s self-authored, one-woman performance, Breathe, Love, Repeat, presently playing at Under St. Marks as part of this year’s Frigid New York Festival, is an autobiographical recounting of her last days with her mother. For anybody this might represent a daunting theme, vast, self-examining, possibly too much. But Murakoshi has an imaginary alter ego to call upon in the face of such a challenge – a samurai super daughter – and unhesitatingly she jumps in and grabs the bull by the horns. Why or whence came this super daughter is never made clear, she just magically appears in the form of Murakoshi heroically brandishing an invisible sword above her head in full spotlight. She is the pluck, the resistance, and later the resilience that help carry the author through the ordeal of watching her mother gradually sicken and decline. She is some sort of Asian folkloric warrior princess, alive to the existence of a spirit realm, knowledgeable of the proper respects and tributes owed the demons that haunt us.

Suzen Murakoshi

Perhaps she springs from her mother’s early Buddhist-inspired tales of the kami spirits of the woods and the proper forms of address and appeasement. Perhaps she’s just an aspect of Suzen the snowboarding fanatic, addicted to the adrenaline rush of speed and movement , the one who seems merely distracted and impatient with her mother’s telephone revelation that she has been diagnosed with cancer. Whoever she is she doesn’t say very much or get into it, just poses heroically in the spotlight with her signatory sword salute after the manner of a manga champion, as undeniable and inscrutable as She-Ra. Correspondingly mother is appraised as Queen Supreme Buddha, a repository of old world wisdom, craft, forbearance and tolerance. We’re in a fantasy realm, whimsically pirouetting atop the darker, sadder world of human suffering and mortality. This is an elegant and fresh strategy for addressing themes of loss and dying.

In several compelling instances Murakoshi elects to turn her back upon the audience, drops into a slouch, and growls out some lines by Dylan Thomas or Shakespeare. Who this stage interloper might be is never addressed, but as a theatrical device it proves quite effective. She certainly can move about the stage in graceful or comedic manner – at one point effortlessly falling into a cartwheel – but when this theatrical persona is dropped, so that we can hear the author speaking in her own voice, there is a dramatic shift to, well, neutral. One just wishes that Murakoshi playing Murakoshi were in some form more actually present upon the stage. The voice is problematic – vocal modulation is narrow and inexpressive, as if she were reading off a list of shopping groceries. There’s a rattling impersonal character in the way she imparts her unfolding story, almost as if she wants the whole thing to be over as soon as possible. The performance lasted just under 45 minutes. It isn’t helpful that Murakoshi seems very comfortable with linguistic and familial cliches such as – “more guilt Mom, pile it on”, and “You were the best Mom in the world.”

In the late stages of her mother’s illness the nurse at the hospice opines that they should administer a shot of morphine to alleviate pain. Mother has expressed the desire to live consciously to the end in the Buddhist tradition, not succumbing to the use of sensory- or pain-killing medications. Murakoshi and samurai super daughter wish to honor this request, and in order to convince the nurse there is no essential need, the author asks her plainly suffering mother to smile and not frown. Which she does. It is a chilling moment and one that touches on the greater theme of: Which reality are you living? Murakoshi appears fully given over to her imaginary universe, almost desperately so, which might rankle with some when the stakes are so critically high. Such audience members might even observe that she can’t fundamentally deal with “reality” and this performance is her apology for the fact. One is left with the sense that at no point has the author gotten out of her own way long enough to approach objectively her mother or, indeed, herself. The concluding mantra, offered as a gem of hard won understanding – Breathe, Love, Repeat – feels cosmetic, unearned, pat, and frankly senseless. A tingling note of emotional exhibitionism prevails which, alas, is the rout of any attempt at sincere understanding or illumination, theatrical or otherwise.

Directed with a light hand by Ching Valdes-Aran, the presentation makes effective use of some simple photographic back shot projections. The silent photo album slide show reserved for the ending is, however, a theatrical misstep, awkwardly lacing the harder stuff with a sentimental syrup at odds with the preceding, and betraying a greater need at work here: the formulation of a hagiographic postcard to the author’s much-loved, late mother. Plainly and simply, after all, samurai super daughter just doesn’t do grief.

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Breathe, Love, Repeat: A near-life experience

Company: Mustique Projects

Directed by: Ching Valdes Valdes

Feb 27, 7:30PM

Mar 02, 10:30PM

Mar 04, 7:00PM

$15.00

UNDER St. Marks

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The 2012 FRIGID NEW YORK FESTIVAL will run February 22-March 4 at The Kraine Theater & The Red Room (85 East 4th Street between 2nd Ave and Bowery) and UNDER St. Marks (94 St. Marks Place between 1st Ave and Ave A). Tickets to all shows may be purchased online at www.FRIGIDnewyork.info or by calling Smarttix at 212-868-4444.

BREATHE LOVE REPEAT: a near-life experience – 5 Things To Know About The Show Before You Go (2012 FRIGID NEW YORK FESTIVAL)

The Happiest Medium — Mon, 30 Jan 2012 21:01:13 +0000

Five Questions. Five Answers. And one big decision: Rock, Paper, or Scissors?

Suzen Murakoshi

BREATHE LOVE REPEAT:a near-life experience

Produced by: The Mustique Projects

A samurai super daughter struggles with her mother at the crossroads between east and west to affirm life between this world and the next.

Show Times:

Wed. 2/22 @ 10:30pm
Fri. 2/24 @ 7:30pm
Mon. 2/27 @ 7:30pm
Fri. 3/2 @ 10:30pm
Sun. 3/4 @ 7:00pm

Answers by Suzen Murakoshi

(Playwright, Performer)

Karen Tortora-Lee’s Question
That’s some title. How did you come up with it – and what does it mean?
Suzen: THANKS! It’s the mantra I was wrestling with at one of the lowest points in my life. The ‘repeat’ part is the hardest, because it’s like, “you mean, I have to do it again? And, again?”

Diánna Martin’s Question
If you were going to invite five people, anyone from past and present, to see your FRIGID show – who would you invite and why?
Suzen:1) I’d invite my mother. Because it’s our story together, and she’s not around anymore. 2) Ditto with my father, same reason. He checked out even sooner than my mom. 3) It seems like I’m inviting all these dead people, but I’d invite Romulus Linney, my play-writing teacher, the best I ever had. I hope he’d be proud of me, he’d at least have suggestions to make it better. 4) And, famous people? Like Shakespeare, because I’d love to meet him. 5) Ditto with Michalangelo.

Antonio Minino’s Question
What is the biggest sacrifice you’ve ever made for your Art and was it worth it?
Suzen: Not going snowboarding this winter. Naw, seriously. It’s like feeling like I’m sacrificing something when I’m really not. Like money, my life, my time, not having kids, not spending more time with mom. These aren’t really sacrifices, but choices. I get to make my own show about my mom.

Geoffrey Paddy Johnson’s Question
Was there any unexpected discovery made during the development of this production and, if so, can you share it?
Suzen: Hmm. It’s that I’m not over not having a mom yet. I don’t know if I’ll ever be able to ‘get over it.’ THAT’s what the show is about. There’s a resolution in the show, but, is there ever really a personal one? It’s still hard to keep going back there …

Michelle Augello-Page’s Question
What do you hope the audience receives from the experience of seeing this show?
Suzen: We (the company, Director and myself) hope people (and I know everyone says this) will understand how important each and every moment is in their lives. The quality of that moment is how much attention is paid there and then. To be completely full present in each second of each encounter with whomever you’re with is a gift that keeps on giving, which we hope BREATHE LOVE REPEAT does actually accomplish.

Rock, Paper, Scissors Tournament of DEAAAAATH

THM Bonus Question – We’re serious this year!

In the THM virtual Rock, Paper, Scissors Tournament of DEAAAAATH which FRIGID Show do you take on? And what do you throw?

Suzen: Blind to Happiness. And I throw SCISSORS.

Thanks BREATHE LOVE REPEAT: a near-life experience for participating in The Happiest Medium’s FRIGID New York Festival 2012 Q&A. And for playing our game! You’re officially SCISSORS in any and all challenges. You may win, you may not – who knows! This is how it works in the crazy world of the Rock, Paper, Scissors Tournament of DEAAAAATH!

For the rest of you don’t forget to check out BREATHE LOVE REPEAT: a near-life experience at UNDER St. Marks!

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