“A Jurassic Parq with a ‘q’,” is how the narrator who calls himself Morgan Freeman (Lee Seymour) — although he looks nothing like the actor — presents the show to the audience. “‘Q’ is for the question.” The dinosaurs will tell us the true story.
A baby-Velociraptor (Brandon Gill) is being released from a lab into a peaceful community of female dinosaurs (yes, you may remember in Jurassic Park they were all females … until they mutated) who are happily inhabiting their island paradise much like Adam and Eve before they committed the original sin – or perhaps like a bunch of Eves since there are no Adams. The matriarch community is lead and watched over by a pastor – a Velociraptor of Faith (John Jeffrey Martin) who favors the creationist theory that all dinosaurs were created in a lab.
The dinosaurs happily sing together “It’s a wonderful day to be a woman,” – until a terrible thing happens. T-Rex 1(Tara Novie) discovers that something is wrong with her. She’s grown a weird “hose” as she describes it. Her friend T-Rex 2 (Natalie Bradshaw), still a female, fusses over her, all in vain. The narrator Morgan Freeman steps in to explain ominously: “It’s the frog’s DNA.”
No one, even the pastor Velociraptor of Faith can explain what possessed the T-Rex 1, but Dilophasourus (Jay Frisby) whispers to the baby-Velociraptor that the pastor has a sister, Velociraptor of Science (Mary Ellen Ashley), who she banished from her sight – and who may have the answer. Baby-Velociraptor embarks on his quest for Velociraptor of Science, while the chaos starts tearing apart the peaceful predators’ community. The cursed T-Rex 1 completes her metamorphosis and becomes a male, accidently mating with Dilophasourus who happens to be nearby. The still female T-Rex 2 tramples in at the wrong moment. “Don’t move,” T-Rex 1 whispers to Dilophasourus. “If we don’t move, she can’t see us.”
But even a dinosaur can’t stand still forever so T-Rex 2 discovers the cross-species lovers and goes berserk. In her wrath, she runs across the small annoying human vehicle and crushes it to pieces. The saga continues as baby-Velociraptor returns with the Velociraptor of Science, who challenges the Velociraptor of Faith’s creationism and insists that science is the answer. Unfortunately the sisters’ are bound to never resolve their arguments: the furious humans shoot Velociraptor of Faith.
No matter how hard you try you can never predict the next twist and turn of this laugh out loud show. Although all the characters in the play except for Morgan Freeman are females, the actors are not. Jurassic Parq does not discriminate by gender. Velociraptor of Faith is played by a man, the mutated T-Rex 1 by a woman. The costumes – consisting of tights and short wrap-around skirts – are as hilarious as the lyrics. The stone hedge props “get you in the mood” before the show even begins. The synopsis of the play said “you should probably see it drunk,” – and you certainly should. Booze boosts your fantasy like nothing else. Especially when it comes to frog’s DNA.
VENUE #7: The Ellen Stewart Theatre @ LA MAMA